Tag Archives: DARLATHEROLLERDERBYQUEEN

True Derby

AN EYE FOR THE LADIES – KIKO JONES

Alex Rodriguez has his eye on the derby ladies. And they are glad he does!

He’s quite the favorite on the derby circuit. They lovingly gave him the skater name of Kiko Jones when he first showed up on the track to coach the Freshmeat (newbie derby skaters in training).

So what brought this giant of a man ( a former football player, marching band member, roller skater and skateboarder) to roller derby?

“It was a tough time in my life in 2008. Then the derby girls from Austin and Houston, where the derby revival began, needed some help in El Paso where they were staring a new league.”

“They needed help with equipment, wheels, bearings and such, and my background as a skateboarder was just the thing for them. It was just the thing I needed also in my life. I fell in love with the concept and gained so much respect for the ladies who worked so hard. They are special!”

The geologist and petroleum surveyor from El Paso went on to use his skills in the men’s derby league as a blocker. He officiates for three different leagues in three different cities.

“I serve as an outside pack ref, an inside pack ref, a jammer ref and the Eye in the Sky.” The last is not his favorite because he’s not on wheels, but it gives him the overview of the game he loves.

“Officiating is every bit as physically and mentally demanding as the game itself. Unlike many other sports, roller derby officials have to see the whole picture of a rule infraction before they can call it. What or who caused it, what the actual infraction is and what was the consequence. All in a split second and on wheels!”

Kiko Jones loves the sport of roller derby. But mostly he loves the girls.

“I’ve learned so much about women. Their passion, their many different and dynamic personalities, how they work so hard and sacrifice their bodies and times for the sport they love.

I love and respect women more than ever.”

SKATE ON, KIKO JONES!

Darla

(Look for more about Alex and other strong derby participants in the 2020 launch of Darla’s book and presentation “Strong Women, Fast Wheels, New Rules: How Roller Derby Can Change Your Life Without Ever Putting on Skates” – a look at the derby rules that can be applied to everyone’s life. Visit Darla’s website to watch for the release and to subscribe to blogs like this)

Art of the Listen - Bench Talk

DECK THE HALLS – FOR JANUARY

Oh, come on, Darla!

January? (I can hear you now). I am just now unpacking the ornaments for the Christmas tree! The turkey leftovers are still fresh in the fridge. January is a year away.

Yeah, me too. Ornaments everywhere. Lists for presents and parties growing. Holiday travel plans. Credit cards out….

So why think about January? Bit of a downer, no?

Agree. January is a downer. So I’ll be ready and on track moving out in January. You can bet the derby teams will be also, with conditioning, auditions and more funky outfits and fierce names.

Don’t get me wrong. This way of thinking isn’t about planning. No, indeed! Don’t plan anything! And it’s not about tightening the ole belt. It’s about living December in the moment with bells on your toes.

We’re not bears, you know. We don’t just put our feet up and snooze the winter months away whilst feasting on our summer catch. It’s down time in high gear.

The people I know who are really living in full December drive while sipping eggnog are the ones cleaning out their closets. Tossing old files. Spring cleaning in December.

Use the kids to clean up and pay them some Christmas spending money for that video game they are bugging you about. You know they will love to stick paper in the shredder.

Take that outfit to Goodwill that didn’t fit this year…or the two years before…and ask for a gift card for Christmas to shop in January.

Jog around the mall before you start shopping. Go chop some wood or dance around the kitchen island while the cookies are in the oven to get in shape. Music blaring. it’s a time to celebrate.

Have robust fun and make space for the next surprise . January is going to love you.

Skate on!

Darla

(photo courtesy of Svetlana Cherruty | Dreamstime.com )

Art of the Listen - Bench Talk

SOUNDS OF SILENCE

So, I am a bit stumped. I want to say something about saying nothing at all. Keeping your mouth shut. But how do I do that without saying something?

It’s a powerful thing, you know. Every park bench conversation has a moment when one or the other bench warmer has an opportunity to open the mouth and spit out what is on his or her mind. Or just shut up.

Reminds me of some iconic songs. “When You Say Nothing At All”, “Silence is Golden”, and of course, “The Sounds of Silence”.

Recently two of my bench companions had young visitors to their houses. Both visitors were fed a meal and said quite openly that they “don’t like it at all.”

A conversation ensued in both cases.

“I don’t like this. Yuk.”

“In my day, a guest didn’t say that, you know.”

“What am I supposed to say?”

“Say Thank You. Or take a bite and say you aren’t very hungry. Or push it around like you ate some of it.”

“But how will you ever know my opinion of it?”

“Who says I want to know?”

I like the second conversation even more.

“I don’t like this. Yuk.”

“OK, that’s fine. Next time you come over, bring your recipe and your money. You can go to the store and buy the food, cook it, put it in front of me and then I’ll tell you what I think about it.”

Since the world has moved well beyond Miss Manners to a place of opinion staters and influencers, where does Silence fit in?

Because Silence is an art form, you know. Silence speaks volumes. Silence has sound. Silence puts you in the power seat.

Or as Thumper’s mother said, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothing at all.” The best thing that ever came out of Disney.

SKATE ON!

(I’m really liking this painted bench from Las Condes, Santiago de Chile. I think she has her mouth shut…..)

Darla

Art of the Listen - Bench Talk, True Derby

THE FUTURE FROM BEHIND

(photo credit: Hanna Dymytriieva | Dreamstime.com )

More bounce per ounce, I say.

Recently I met with a group of derby girls from Seattle, Washington. I asked them about the future of derby.

“It’s the junior skaters,” they said, all in agreement. “They can do all kinds of things we can’t.”

“They fall down and literally bounce right back up. “

“They take chances we didn’t take. They come up with moves we didn’t think about.”

“They are redefining the sport from behind us.”

Seems to me that pretty much sums up life, I thought to myself later.

While we are fretting and arguing and trying to plan the future, maybe we should be looking behind us. To the next generation of chance takers, dreamers and bounce-back-uppers.

They may just sneak up behind us with some answers.

In the meantime, SKATE ON!

DARLA

Art of the Listen - Bench Talk

The Eyes have it…

So, this is a bench that should make you look. And make you smile…all the way to your eyes.

Doesn’t matter whether it’s very comfortable. Or whether you get that it’s made of skateboards (slightly used and bent, maybe).

Or that maybe you can’t make out all the words or understand the languages displayed on the bench.

It’s going to make you smile.

And let’s say someone else walks by and looks at this bench and smiles at you. Or laughs. Or shrugs.

You don’t have to understand that person’s language. Or why they smiled at you. Or even what they are thinking. The eyes have it.

Long before socially accepted manners said you shouldn’t stare at someone…or social media allowed you to converse without looking at the other person…we were talking with our eyes.

So try a little bench talk with your eyes today. It makes a world of a difference in the world.

That’s my bench advice for the day (she says, eyes smiling.)

SKATE ON!

Darla